Holy Tornado

To see the soul of your comrade listen carefully to his music.

Saturday, April 30, 2005

Stoopidest Moment


Patty Jo has tagged me for the stoopidest moment confession. This is really tough because when you get to be my age there are so dang many, and you have tried desperately to forget them!

I guess one of the stoopidest was when I was in my late twenty's, my two younger sisters and I decided to go deer hunting and show our hubbie's how it's done. They had gone on several unsuccessful hunts, and since we were raised in a hunting family we were very confident that we could bring home the venison.

We sat together with maps and decided the best place to go, discussed our strategy, cleaned and polished the rifles, and early the next morning we packed some sandwiches and coffee, dressed like hunters and even wore the right shoes, and bright colored vests. Then we drove to an area in the county which is known to be infested with deer. Word was you couldn't take a step without stumbling over them.

It was sunrise as we slowly crept through the dewey forest, it was perfectly silent. Each step we took was carefully examined for twigs or anything which might create a sound, that would frighten the deer off. The wet fir branches brushed our faces as we quietly followed one after the other in the quest as old as time itself.
No doubt the DNA of our Native American heritage was in full bloom that day. We were the hunters.

Eventually we came to a boggy area with a large pond. Many kinds of trees were hanging over it and fallen trees were raised grotesquely out of the water. The entire area was covered with the kind of foggy mist you see in horror movies. I was feeling very uneasy by this time. My incredible imagination was taking me for one heck of a trip, and I was visualizing some hideous monster rising up from the pond with slimy algae hanging from it's head and mouth. Or perhaps a Bigfoot hiding in the thicket, huge and smelly, waiting for us to get a little closer................

The three of us stopped for a few moments, mesmerized by the sight and ambiance of the place. We were supposed to be looking for a deer, but I think my sisters were looking for the same thing I was.
Then slowly we continued to creep through the brush, as silently as possible, hardly breathing, and listening for any sound that might lead us to the hunted.

Then suddenly, there was a loud rumbling sound, right in front of us. Shrieking to high heaven, we quickly huddled close together in utter terror, sure the monster had slithered from the pond and was about to attack us. I totally forgot I was carrying a loaded rifle, I was so frightened I couldn't have used it anyway. It was about this time I felt something warm trickle down the inside of my leg.

It turned out the monster was a Grouse that we had frightened off it's nest. They sure are loud when they fly!

Well, between the noisy grouse and the three shrieking lady hunters, we figured any deer would be in the next state already so we concluded our hunting trip by walking around the pond, discovering the ramains of an old cabin and hunting for old bottles in a trash heap, while some strange bird made eerie bird calls from the pond. At least I think it was a bird.

Of course reporting to hubby when he came home from work, was a snap. I told him what he always told me.
"Too many hunters have chased the deer off."

I sure hate walking with wet pants.